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Post by Inside info Mation on Aug 21, 2010 15:23:44 GMT -5
Is Boni Jergen real ? Are Marlon and Bananas real ? Think about it ? I think Neil Hamburger invented Boni Jergen and the two dogs. Boni isn't dead, "she's" on tour in Scotland. Boni is Neil's alter-ego, it all makes sense. I bet "Boni Jergen" is an anagram for something. Neil Hamburger wouldn't want to be seen running a fan web-site...out of a card-board box. Boni has no email address ?? But a unique link to sales for all Neil's merchandise VIRUS Boni is Neil. SO be nice to Boni, because THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT'S her life !
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Post by RyanStamen on Aug 21, 2010 15:40:45 GMT -5
This is idiotic! I've met Boni on several occasions at the AZ Neil shows, and she even brought both Mar and Ban to the show at Modified a few years ago.
Here we go with another "anonymous" user posting fake information to once again HURT Neil. This is what I have been talking about all along. This seems to imply Neil has no fans. WRONG AGAIN!
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Post by Inside info Mation on Aug 21, 2010 15:48:38 GMT -5
sorry for hurting Neil's career. Have they pulled him of stage in Scotland because of my last message ?
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Post by fun on Aug 22, 2010 1:17:11 GMT -5
haha now THAT was funny!
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Post by NOT anonymous on Aug 23, 2010 1:51:38 GMT -5
This is idiotic! I've met Boni on several occasions at the AZ Neil shows, and she even brought both Mar and Ban to the show at Modified a few years ago. Here we go with another "anonymous" user posting fake information to once again HURT Neil. This is what I have been talking about all along. This seems to imply Neil has no fans. WRONG AGAIN! Amen, Ryan Stamen. These posers, fakers, & malcontents are obviously just jealous that Neil has such COMMITTED FANS! Getting on here, talking trash about the fans, the board, and now even BONI! Fanbase, we must BANNED TOGETHER to stop this sort of false rumour-mongering. (PS Ryan do you think Boni is missing, or just dead?) |
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Post by NOT anyonymous on Aug 23, 2010 1:53:37 GMT -5
This is idiotic! I've met Boni on several occasions at the AZ Neil shows, and she even brought both Mar and Ban to the show at Modified a few years ago. Here we go with another "anonymous" user posting fake information to once again HURT Neil. This is what I have been talking about all along. This seems to imply Neil has no fans. WRONG AGAIN! AMEN, RYAN! All these fakers, posers, & malcontents are obviously just JEALOUS that Neil has such a COMMITTED fanbase! (P.S. Ryan, do you think Boni is missing, or just dead?) |
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Post by UHoh on Aug 23, 2010 1:54:41 GMT -5
That posted twiced, & prove sabotage!
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Post by Inside info Mation on Aug 23, 2010 3:01:10 GMT -5
hey there "NOT anyonymous" - it was just a question. Is Boni Jergen real ? Obviously you think "yes". But then you go on to ask if she is dead - now THAT is being a faker, poser, malcontent and you are obviously just JEALOUS of Boni. "Boni"is alive and well, her website gets regular updates of Neil's tour dates - but you'd KNOW that, because you are a "COMMITTED" Fan - right ?
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Post by pearlgrey on Aug 23, 2010 3:29:19 GMT -5
I have had one brief phone conversation with Boni, proving to me that she is indeed a real and actual person. She's just real flighty, you can't pin her down too easy. She does have somethign in common with Neil then in that reagard.
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Post by BROTHER PZONE on Aug 23, 2010 3:32:53 GMT -5
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO PROVE THAT YOU ARE REAL NEIL FAN, WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO DO TO GO THE DISTANCE!
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Post by Inside info Mation on Aug 23, 2010 4:34:43 GMT -5
hmmmmmmm RyanStamen and Pearlgrey, who are closely associated with the website, both quickly say Boni is real. Has anyone ELSE met Boni or spoken to Boni ? What would Columbo say about "Boni's" closest allies quickly taking the time to say she is real. ...Maybe they are in on it too. Who has met Boni ? - Read Boni's posts, one after the other - she has a LOT of inside information about Neil Hamburger. -She bobs up with all the important information, at just the right time - then disappears. Knock 'em dead on your UK tour Boni.
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A secret is a secret but
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Post by A secret is a secret but on Aug 24, 2010 15:42:56 GMT -5
From Boni's "UNOFFICIAL" America's Funnyman homepage:
DONATIONS NEEDED! HELP SAVE THIS WEB SITE!!!Money, or Dog food, these two Dogs (Bananas and Marlon) expecialy like SWANSON CHICKEN POT PIES, or T.V Dinners, or old Tacos, Waffles, they like Italian food, bread sticks, Ice cream, spageti with tomatoes sauce, any thing would Do, if you Work in a resaurant, PLEASE Save any throw-away or Spoiled, ruined Food, for my Dogs. Thank You!!! Also if you work for U.P.S. or Fedaral Express, we need a Way to ship all this Food from the Resaurants, to my Dogs, if you can give us a Code Number for free shipping.
Sorry to be a spoil-sport, but THAT sort of talk is straight out of the Neil Hamburger joke book. Neil and Boni are the same.
BUT, while I don't want to spoil the act any more than I have (not that anyone has read my spoiler) - the INTERESTING thing is that Neil can't help being funny, even when he's trying to be someone else and hide his identity.
Ryan and Pearlgrey or anyone - are you going to seriously tell me that Boni wants icecream and SWANSON CHICKEN POT PIES sent to her dogs for free by people c/- U.P.S. or FEDERAL EXPRESS ? ? ?
I say it's a waste that fans aren't in on the Boni Jergen joke.
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Post by cataclysm on Aug 24, 2010 19:52:05 GMT -5
This is the ruination of everything I hold dear. And I do mean EVERYTHING  |
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Post by RyanStamen on Aug 24, 2010 21:50:51 GMT -5
I know Boni because we both live in the same city and are both big fans of Neil's. I go to his shows here in Phoenix and see her there as a result. I also used to shop at the Goodwill she worked at for awhile (near the Olive Garden at the Fiesta Mall where a lot of the leftovers for her dogs come from, she says the manager is nice -- and had a good thing going until that jerk of a landlord Karl Malone complained about the smell!)
I love your conspiracy theory! I must be Neil as well since I am "closely associated with the website." My theory is that Neil himself might be the only person who uses this message board, and has posted thousands of messages to himself. Constantly fighting with and praising himself in an endless loop of despair. This must be true, since as you imply, he has no real fans.
Whoever you are, you are just posting on this message board to once again discredit a good comedian. Like I have been saying ALL ALONG, people come on here to RUIN NEIL because he's famous and not like Dane Cook or that ventriloquist guy.
Boni, you are not helping right now with your absenteeism either!
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Post by Boni Hamburger on Aug 24, 2010 23:32:01 GMT -5
Ryan, If you LOVE my conspiracy theory, then stop worrying about it. I think it is a very good theory and I love it too. You didn't answer my question, which was that Boni's request of SWANSON CHICKEN POT PIES and Ice-cream, for her dogs, to be sent for free by Fedex, is totally unrealistic and something you would expect from the wit of Neil Hamburger. Right ? Or is Boni just a very funny lady who happens to have the worst luck IN THE WORLD, and disappears from the boards every time Neil Hamburger is on tour - Clark Kent style.
Perhaps you can't read. I never said Neil has no fans. Where did you get that from ? I am saying he has ONE less fan - Boni, because she is Neil Hamburger.
How will my FUN conspiracy theory RUIN Neil's career ? That is dumb. I have read magazine articles suggesting Neil Hamburger used to be someone else, that he may in fact be a character -
I don't think that has spoilt his career. Have you heard of Ronald McDonald Ryan ? - I won't spoil it for you, but there is a chance Ronald is not a real person. If Boni isn't real and Marlon and Bananas aren't real, you think that will RUIN Neil's career. If it ruins it for you, then you are not a true fan. It does not ruin anything for me, I think it's hilarious and also modest, that he doesn't want to be seen running his own website. That would be --- out of character.
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